I’m thinking of recording ya ntate Thuso Motaung as I write this lol and he emphases the fact that love is painful…. heeeeeee mara lona le painful ka nnete hleng. 2019 was the year nje that left with many relationships 🙆🏾‍♀️🙆🏾‍♀️🙆🏾‍♀️ Ke re every month best believe that there is a couple out there that’s breaking up or the relationship has reached the graveyard – bo “I’m quiet because you are quiet” or straight up ghosting.

This post was supposed to be the start of the 2020 #SthandwaSakaSeries posts where I share my story on my love lessons from the past decade and invite ya’ll to share yours as well but it’s been difficult for me to finish writing it. It was difficult going back and pinpointing my pains, mistakes and clownery nje.

I have reflected on all my experiences and WOW, I clearly need to do better for myself! In Jan, I even shared what was supposed to be the entry form for the series with 2 friends I thought wouldn’t mind telling their stories… HAAAA KUBUHLUNGU THERE ALSO SO IT’S NOT HAPPENING!

It’s only clear now (13 February 2020 as I finish the post) that this post is just supposed to be encouragement for a personal exercise to do in the comfort of your home shame. Where you can literally re-live everything – smile, laugh, cry, be angry, grieve, accept, make missions to move on (if this is what you want ofcos) and find peace.

I’ve written letters to my people expressing every little thing (also apologised) then I prayed over them and eventually burnt them. I also wrote to myself and my toxic contributions to my past relationships lol ke na le emotional blackmail tendencies sometimes yazi ene I’m not proud of that… Anyway, it’s above me now lol. This has been very therapeutic for me and I hope you (if you are breathing through the wound at the moment) find your peace as well. Nna ke mona fela rn…

Anywhooo, I’m still hopeful I will find a person for a long time (not a fun time)… I mean I’m already finna secure someborri’s son if o wa secureha le ena oo lol.

What are your love lessons from the previous decade? You can comment below to share or if you want to have your story featured you can submit your story here http://bit.ly/SthandwaSeries2020 and I will feature it during the last days of February – no pressure 😜 ! I’ve also started compiling a playlist and added some of my favourite love songs to compliment this year’s #StandwaSakaSeries.

My specific song selection for this year’s playlist is Iman Omari “Tripping” and that line in the song that says “I will be better off here without you” hits… I dedicate this to bo love baka from the previous decade shame. I’ve mourned and cementing the experiences ke shapo (when I’m not triggered by di random “I hope you are well.” texts ofcos)!

You can stream and listen to the playlist here and throw in a dedication or two in there as well ha o batla. Hope ya’ll enjoy it! 😇😇😇

Happy Valentine’s Day!

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